Tuesday, June 28, 2011

The Chunky Monkey Challenge

So I come back home from picking up some odds and ends and am greeted by the sight of Clare sprawled on the couch, scraping the final traces of Chunky Monkey ice cream from a pint container, with my latest issue of Self magazine propped on her lap.

Clare looked up when I entered the room and said, “Hey Matts, says here there are 58 ways to burn 100 calories. Who knew?”

I let her know that the process of moving the ice cream spoon from the container to her mouth probably wasn’t one of those 58 ways.

“Clare, if you’re serious about trying to lose weight, you may want to consider exercising,” I said. “I mean, let’s face it – sometimes it’s all I can do to drag you out to do some quick errands.”

“Hey, I go out from time to time. Just today, I walked all the way to the mailbox to post a letter.”

“That’s not what I mean, and you know it. Why not come with me to my aerobics class next week?”

“Aerobics! Are you kidding? Matts, you know my coordination is awful; can’t tell my right from my left on a good day. Besides, I hate getting all sweaty.”

“Clare, you’ll do fine. I’ll be there to help guide you along and we’ll have fun. Really!”

“Nope, not gonna’ do it,” said Clare.

Seeing I was getting nowhere fast, I made the most pleading look I could muster and said, “Pleeeze, Clare? Pleeeze, do it for me?”

“You know how much I can’t stand it when you give me that look – all big baby blues just begging with every blink.”

“C’mon Clare, try it.”

With a huge sigh and shoulders sagging, she finally caved. Little did she know what she was in for.

The next week, we arrived at the aerobics studio and I introduced her to our expert instructor, Rachel. She was tickled pink having Clare part of the group and reassured our “newbie” that she would be just fine.

But when Rachel started her warm-up routine, she didn’t expect to hear all the grunting and groaning noises coming from Clare. Matter of fact, the whole class was staring at her!

Things got worse, but there was a surprise in store with this awkward situation. I can’t do it justice here, but you can find out how this story ends when Mary publishes her next book featuring Yours Truly (and of course, Clare). Stay tuned.

Go here to find out how my adventures began.


  1. LOL, sorry but I soooo identify with Clare. My gym instructor says I'm her favorite because she can tell by my grunts that I'm reallllly getting it.Thanks for the chuckle and the invite.
    I'm at http://www.ragesexandteddybears.blogspot.com

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